The Rick Perry 'Pro-Business,' Anti-Regulation Business-is-Booming Cross-Country Juggernaut

"when you have a politician traveling across the country selling a state with low regulatory capacity, that politician also has to be accountable for what happens when that lack of regulation proves to be fatal.

That's exponentially more offensive to me."

Rick Perry has responded to the above cartoon "with extreme disgust and disappointment."

Governor, the cartoon that disgusts and disappoints this Texas citizen even more than the one pictured above is that of a callous elected state representative running around the country suggesting that his state condones your lazy and lackadaisical oversight of the hundreds of dangerous enterprises currently operating here.

The cartoon character who, after witnessing 14 people killed, over 200 injured and more than 350 homes damaged, trotted to Illinois and said, "Through their elected officials [people] clearly send the message of their comfort with the amount of oversight.”

That, Mr. Perry is the epitome of disgusting, disappointing rhetoric.

Dear Beantown, I'm so sorry for our loss

I've been following with great interest the developments in my home state following the tragic bombing that cost dear loss of life and limb.

When the story broke of explosions in the Copley area, I was horrified to hear of such tragedy so near my old stomping grounds. Despite my joy knowing my family and friends are safely tucked away in the western part of the state, I feel deeply distressed at the ensuing news.

So, I shall flick my Boston Bruins lighter I picked up at a local corner store while grabbing an early-morning Dunkin' Donuts coffee and send my beloved state some serious love and condolences. Peace to all.

Our Big Blue Marble: An Amazing Time-Lapsed View

Democrats vs. the 21st Century Nero

Hoo, boy. Look at those buffoon Republicans over there. They don't have a chance at the White House in 2016.

Yuck, yuck, yuck. Did you hear the one about the Republican Senate candidate who went down in flames over some stupid rape comments? Chuckle, chuckle, chuckle. Which one?

Oh, that Reince Priebus. He, batshit insane NRA chief LaPierre and that whacky neurosurgeon who got laughed off the front pages are in real trouble. That gets a guffaw.

Now, one might suspect that "Nero" in this modern tale would be the Democrats -- fiddling away as the political Rome burned to the ground at their feet. It's not.

The real Nero, in this The Year of Our Lord 2013, is the combined forces of the Conservative establishment, the Republican Party and their billionaire patron saints. Democrats, as our city is consumed, stand in the wings pointing and mocking the bumbling ineptitude of our rivals.

A stark parallel arises from this tale from Ancient Rome. Indisputably, Nero was a ruthlessly brutal and cruel emperor who is said to have "engaged in every sort of obscenity." He took office with a plan -- a sprawling palatial complex, a Domus Aurea -- but had no room for it in the crowded city. Until a massive fire of dubious origin ravaged the sprawling metropolis, conveniently making room not only for the palace but for an urban center the young ruler had been building in his mind over the years.

For our purposes, I'll admit that no one really knows how that fire got started. What we do know is who got final say in what happened after it. Nero got both his palace and his model city. In our modern analogy, he shuttered or limited access to most abortion clinics, spread "Stand Your Ground" laws like a contagion, re-drew districts to his advantage and wrested control of state legislatures. And, having laughed mightily at Nero's miserable fire response, Democrats now stand by scratching their heads wondering how it is that most Americans support background checks but they can't seem to get those danged laws passed ... even with a powerful tailwind pushing them #Forward.

Who could have possibly seen THIS coming?

In the rush to extract the last possible drop of crude from the ground and push the most toxic fossil fuel on the planet through the pristine American mid-western plains, Canada's greedy bastards joined forces with America's greedy bastards to foist the environmentally dangerous XL Pipeline on America's unwitting citizenry.

State Department: No Environmental Reason To Delay Keystone XL 

If you haven't guessed by now, Truth rushed in and slapped a whole bunch of "Real^TM" Americans bang upside their ever-trusting heads. The town of Mayfield, Arkansas, gained notoriety over the Easter weekend as Exxon-Mobil went out of its way to prove the State Department big, fat liars. Aw, hell, the fat cats could have been satisfied with their global record-setting $44 billion in profits, but naw, why not go fuck over a middle-class neighborhood and its nearby fishing hole. After all, the majority of these Red State denizens were probably too busy online bashing the Obama Administration for giving a shit about their delightful little homes and local water supply to notice the sludge rushing into the subdivision.

There's a Whole Class of Dangerous 'Intellectuals' in America-Always Ready to Shill for the Powerful|Alternet alternet.org/media/theres-w…
— deb (@smallhousedeb) April 2, 2013

CRYBABY: Racist moron dishes hate then buckles under heat

Cloaked with the veil of social network anonymity, they're big, bad, bold and bodacious. They spew racism and spread hate. They talk smack about the weakest among us pumped up on power, entitlement and, I suspect, steroids. They're a new breed of cyber-bully -- cowards so full of self-loathing, fear and conspiracy theories that they can live next door to you wearing their daytime personas so neatly that you'd never believe they could muster such hate in their hearts.

They talk of Jesus and the Bible and The Constitution in such glowing terms that you greet them each day fully believing that they actually believe in these things. They posture as some cartoon caricature of a dime novel hero: someone strong, invincible and bearing the standard of justice and morality.

Yet, the latest poster boy of such jingoistic "heroism" did the unthinkable in these circles of contrived bravado: he sat down and cried when caught. John Wayne would be sad to see it.

Meet Timothy Dluhos, the 34-year-old FDNY EMS lieutenant and latest variety of the legend in my own mind sort who boldly went where no real hero resides: Twitter. Here, he ranted and raved about the injustices of being an EMS lieutenant in the largest, most diverse U.S. city on a public forum -- not smart enough to know the genesis of TMI is always knowable. And, after blowing hard about the badass nature of guns and brawn, was too whiny to hold up to questioning from a wimp reporter armed with a mere notepad and pen.

Here's his reaction:

Pull up your diapers, man. You sort of look like this girl ...

DisMade in America: Where DOES this stuff come from?

The mission seemed simple enough. Walk into an auto parts store and buy a spark plug "Made in America."

I realize a lot of stuff is no longer even manufactured in this country and American workers are paying that price with a double whammy of lost wages and crappy products. I try to do my part to support the American worker every time I walk into a store or shop online. Pretty sad when the highlight of my day is pulling on my New Balance socks with "Made in America" proudly stamped inside their collars.

In a Federal Register notice announcing amendments to this provision, the Customs Service indicated that, where a product has a foreign origin, any references to the United States made in the context of a statement relating to any aspect of the production or distribution of the product (e.g., "Designed in USA," "Made for XYZ Corporation, California, U.S.A.," or "Distributed by ABC, Inc., Colorado, USA") would be considered misleading to the ultimate purchaser and would require foreign country-of-origin marking in accordance with the above provision. 

Finding goods crafted by and for fellow countrymen has become a tough slog and is something of a daily pilgrimage. Corporations work their label designers overtime trying to hide the fact that goods are produced by foreign labor. Hell, now some companies are hiding the foreigness of their stuff by leaving off the manufacturing info and subbing in the company's distribution addresses. This, of course, gives me the perfect opportunity to stand in front of their high-priced, meticulously-groomed displays while calling their handy 800 number on that label to ask a surprised call center attendant where it is produced. I do use my very best command voice so their potential customers hear the question. It's always gratifying to see how many people start picking up packages and checking that for themselves upon hearing the question.

So, back at our local auto parts store where I've just asked for a spark plug made domestically and have gotten that "Where'd you park your spaceship" look.

Heir Club 4 Growth: Orangutan Edition

In the modern world of cuckoo conservatism, too many deranged lunatics of the right-wing variety have come to the fore to name any one of them the movement's standard bearing Top Grifter. Yet, if any one of these air-sucking bimbos wins the prize for taking best advantage of his 60 minutes of idiocy-producing fame, it would be the self-promoting, mop-topped ignoramus formerly known as Donald Trump.

Trump has gone from failed presidential candidate for the Compost Tea Party, that fecal-strewn dumping ground for deranged American pseudo-politicians, to simply failed American absent the ability to differentiate between the Trump-descriptive term "joke" and "legally-binding contract."

What follows is a take-down of the idiot's judiciary-clogging frivolity by the comedian who fired up the lone cell in The Donald's brain -- Bill Maher. Hilarity follows.

Oh, Donald ...

For the love of guns

I find little so tantalizing as the sulfuric gunpowder aroma that wafts up the barrel of a freshly-fired rifle. When coupled with downing a peephole-sized silhouette 400-plus meters downrange, it is positively electrifying.

Chest-bumping an M60 as it rapid-fires a spray of 7.62 mike-mikes over an impact area is as mesmerizing as flipping grenades into a foxhole or watching a Claymore's Front Toward Enemy pepper-spray a target to pieces.

Image of soldier live-firing Colt M4 carbine

Yup, I love guns, weaponry, actually, and not merely the firing of them. I lovingly clean them, practice disassembly and assembly of them blind-folded then use them to down targets in an impact area. Yeah, I'm kind of a gun freak in my way. Much of that was born during my time in the military, as I had only sort of fired a shotgun or two prior to signing up.

Having a passion for firearms, however, doesn't mean I believe every American should have access to a tricked out assault weapon with a muzzle velocity of 3,200 fps, a muzzle energy of 2,400 ft lbs. capable of firing 50 rounds a minute.

RIP Chris Kyle: A cautionary tale

In this April 6, 2012, photo, former Navy SEAL and author of the book "American Sniper"
Chris Kyle poses in Midlothian, Texas. (AP Photo/The Fort Worth Star-Telegram, Paul Moseley)

“The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun,” 

 -- NRA CEO Wayne LaPierre

Via ABC World News, a man is under arrest in connection with the killing of two men at an Erath County, Texas, gun range, police said.

One of the victims is former Navy SEAL and "American Sniper" author Chris Kyle.

Inbound reports from the scene are muddy at the moment, but this much is known: Kyle, a highly-decorated military veteran, was with a neighbor at a Texas shooting range when a gunman with a documented case of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) allegedly gunned down the two men, both presumably among LaPierre's class of "good guys with guns."

It is neither too early to mourn the loss of a fallen brother-in-arms nor too early to start the fight to ensure no others fall at the hands of an armed broken man who should be neither.