CRYBABY: Racist moron dishes hate then buckles under heat

Cloaked with the veil of social network anonymity, they're big, bad, bold and bodacious. They spew racism and spread hate. They talk smack about the weakest among us pumped up on power, entitlement and, I suspect, steroids. They're a new breed of cyber-bully -- cowards so full of self-loathing, fear and conspiracy theories that they can live next door to you wearing their daytime personas so neatly that you'd never believe they could muster such hate in their hearts.

They talk of Jesus and the Bible and The Constitution in such glowing terms that you greet them each day fully believing that they actually believe in these things. They posture as some cartoon caricature of a dime novel hero: someone strong, invincible and bearing the standard of justice and morality.

Yet, the latest poster boy of such jingoistic "heroism" did the unthinkable in these circles of contrived bravado: he sat down and cried when caught. John Wayne would be sad to see it.

Meet Timothy Dluhos, the 34-year-old FDNY EMS lieutenant and latest variety of the legend in my own mind sort who boldly went where no real hero resides: Twitter. Here, he ranted and raved about the injustices of being an EMS lieutenant in the largest, most diverse U.S. city on a public forum -- not smart enough to know the genesis of TMI is always knowable. And, after blowing hard about the badass nature of guns and brawn, was too whiny to hold up to questioning from a wimp reporter armed with a mere notepad and pen.

Here's his reaction:

Pull up your diapers, man. You sort of look like this girl ...

Heir Club 4 Growth: Orangutan Edition

In the modern world of cuckoo conservatism, too many deranged lunatics of the right-wing variety have come to the fore to name any one of them the movement's standard bearing Top Grifter. Yet, if any one of these air-sucking bimbos wins the prize for taking best advantage of his 60 minutes of idiocy-producing fame, it would be the self-promoting, mop-topped ignoramus formerly known as Donald Trump.

Trump has gone from failed presidential candidate for the Compost Tea Party, that fecal-strewn dumping ground for deranged American pseudo-politicians, to simply failed American absent the ability to differentiate between the Trump-descriptive term "joke" and "legally-binding contract."

What follows is a take-down of the idiot's judiciary-clogging frivolity by the comedian who fired up the lone cell in The Donald's brain -- Bill Maher. Hilarity follows.

Oh, Donald ...

Outsourcer-in-chief keeps outsourcing badly

Buried deep in the breaking news about election fraud enveloping Willard Romney and the Republican party is a nugget that could negatively impact the candidate's ability to rally his troops in advance of November 6.

The bombshell hidden behind the fraud allegations is the fact that the Romney campaign had depended on the firm behind the scandal for much of its GOTV (Get Out The Vote) efforts in some hotly-contested swing states. Willard's team outsourced this activity to the RNC, which in turn paid state parties which further paid consulting firm Strategic Allied Consulting to energize the base and ensure voters showed up to cast ballots.

The development puts the ground game advantage back into the Obama team's court.

After dumping about $3.1 million into the coffers of the Republican vendor, now under investigation for submitting 108 fraudulent voter registrations in Florida, Romney and the party pulled away from deals with the company. The GOP political teams, aware of the firm's past allegations of electoral indiscretions, agreed to embrace the business if it changed its name, so as "to not be a distraction."

Butter and jam for your #Romneytoast

AmericanBridge Pac 21st Century  strikes back

Adventures in Wingnutia: High Priest of The Stupid Edition

 Speaking before a conservative audience at the annual Values Voter Summit Saturday, former GOP presidential candidate Rick Santorum said that conservatives “will never have the elite smart people on our side.”

“We will never have the elite smart people on our side, because they believe they should have the power to tell you what to do,” said Santorum, adding, “So our colleges and universities, they’re not going to be on our side.

DEVO unleashes Seamus: Don't Roof Rack Me, Bro

Jerry Casales, of DEVO, tells Rolling Stone that in tribute to Seamus and disrespected dogs everywhere, his group has released a web video entitled, "Don't Roof Rack Me, Bro."

The track also comes as Devo's founder and commercial director, Gerald V. Casale, kicks off his Remember Seamus campaign, which is supposed to help "make 2012 the year where animals like Seamus are valued and honesty is praised."

Devo is also helping to back Dogs Against Romney, with Casale designing a special edition shirt for the group. Casale is also involved in an upcoming smartphone game called "The Crate Escape: Seamus Unleashed," which sees release on August 26th, otherwise known as National Dog Day.

Adventures in Wingnuttia: WSJ Asswipe Edition

Without comment, other than to note this is in reference to the young men who laid down their lives protecting their loved ones:

(h/t to John Cole of Balloon Juice)